Thunderbolts Files: Deadpool

Thunderbolts Files: Deadpool

Thunderbolts #3 preview art by Steve Dillon

By Tim Stevens

As requested, I have prepared readiness reports on those currently under consideration for the THUNDERBOLTS initiative per the orders of General Ross. Colonel Daniel Way and I performed the following evaluation of Wade Wilson, aka Deadpool.

Tactical Assessment by Daniel Way

Strength

“It’s not that Deadpool thinks outside the box, it’s that for him, there is no box. From planning to execution, Deadpool’s strategies are as undecipherable as they are effective. Coupled with his extraordinary proficiency with violence, this makes Deadpool an offensive threat that has no corresponding defensive solution.”

Weakness

“For someone who can regenerate at an inhuman pace, Deadpool is nonetheless constantly incomplete. He’s always looking for something that he’s convinced himself will make him feel whole in some way. Thus distracted, Deadpool often doesn’t notice when his emotional fixations supplant tactical goals.”

Psychological Evaluation by Tim Stevens

It must be said that asking me to evaluate this subject’s fitness for this project represents a conflict of interest I am unlikely to be able to overcome. He has threatened my family on numerous occasions, albeit as “jokes,” and his sense of boundaries is nonexistent. He is, in my opinion, the single worst client I’ve worked with.

To speak more generally, Deadpool appears to suffer from a significant mental illness. He often speaks to other voices in his head—please note: all indications are that this is not a case of Dissociative Identity Disorder but rather all the “voices” are him. He has admitted to experiencing vivid hallucinations, often while engaged in combat situations. This is unquestionably a liability.

Additionally, he is distracting. Severely. While his inane chatter seemed not to bother him in the least, it is unlikely his teammates will feel the same. In battle, the last thing other members of the Thunderbolts will need is distraction. It will be problematic for their focus and their ability to hold their emotions in check.

If I could reject one candidate outright for the team, it would certainly be Deadpool.

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