We love you and your monkey, Justin Bieber, but we're starting to feel a little weird about this.
If you've been reading the Justin Bieber Daily News (a not-real publication that we just made up), you'll know that our boy Justin has recently adopted a pet capuchin monkey. And when we first saw The Biebs cradling that cuter-than-cute monkey in his arms like a proud new dad, first we had the obligatory "AWW" attack, then we got to worrying. Because even though it SOUNDS cute in theory, how would Justin owning a monkey pan out in reality? Would he employ a special monkey crew to take care of it while he performs on tour? Where would it live on the tour bus? How would Justin even go about transporting that thing from country to country? Germany certainly had its suspicions when they quarantined it due to lack of official papers (which could result in a big-ass fine). See, these are the thing NO ONE TELLS YOU when you sign up to own a monkey. Plus, now that we've seen even more photos of Justin and his fuzzy friend, we're starting to be less SQUEE and more side-eye. In fact, we're officially starting to feel weird about Justin Bieber's monkey.
Read more about Justin Bieber's pet monkey after the jump.
Listen up, Justin: That monkey may LOOK all cute, but actually owning a pet / having a pretend child is SO MUCH MORE than adorable sleeping teddy bear photos and other assorted Instagram moments! So, let's play therapist for a second and try to work out what's really going on here. Does getting a dog or cat seem too conformist? Are you laying the groundwork for a Neverland Ranch-type situation? Daddy issues? Lastly, doesn't this remind you of "Friends" where Ross got a capuchin named Marcel and had to donate it to a zoo because a.) it's illegal for him to own a monkey in the first place and b.) it went through puberty and started humping everything? Just saying... David Schwimmer could be your future. Interpret that however you like.
On second thought, KEEP IT, IT'S SO CUTE.
Photo credit: @JustinBieber
|